Bellshill choppers kf.
- Thread starter ChaMcg
- Start date
weedavie_j
Club Member
Re: Bellshill choppers kf.
Dunno aboot DonZzz but a think big Cha must be intergalactic at the moment, huzznae been seen for light years
Dunno aboot DonZzz but a think big Cha must be intergalactic at the moment, huzznae been seen for light years
ScrappyG
Club Member
Commander Zero
Club Member
Re: Bellshill choppers kf.
Gypsy, Doc who is only a tv programm mate, it's awe done with cameras an stuff, the inspection pit is for real man. :wink:
Gypsy, Doc who is only a tv programm mate, it's awe done with cameras an stuff, the inspection pit is for real man. :wink:
Commander Zero
Club Member
Re: Bellshill choppers kf.
Big Cha had a bit of a mishap a while ago...it all happened when we were going intae Michaels' inspection pit on level 9, we needed new spark plugs but level 9 is at 140 bar rather than earth atmospheric pressure. it's because the spark plugs region 2 use are special in that they are manufacutred on gremcenie 4b and so will run better under heavy load and explosivness in the pressure of the cylinders. these special plugs don't come in pairs as each cylinder is different and they have to be matched. to do this the bike is transported via a gravitational singularity intae level 9 as the fitting hus tae take place under special environmental conditions in the inspection pit thus the 140 bar pressure. but unfortunately as we are organic in origin a gravitational singularity wid throw our cells and dna intae awe sort of the chaotic variations, as has been seen in a few region 2 members, so until we perfect the transportation of organic material we huv tae dae it the human way and use the door. :wink:
as we came tae the door Big Cha started to equalise the pressure
eventualy after 43mins the guage drops to 0 bar I turned round and walked up the corridor and went tae download the shelfing code ontae my BFUSB stick, Cha started to unseal the door,when suddenly we heard a shout fae big horgjunlix ...
(Translation)
NNNNaaaaaawwwwww!! don't open the fukin door Big Man the guage is stuck.....NAW Chaaaaaaaaaaa...nnawww!!!!
but it was too late...there wis a catastophic equalisation of the pressure, we awe got thown aboot like bubbles in a newly poured pint of spiced rum an c0ke.
We awe ran back tae the door and big Cha wiz layin face doon on the fler knocked oot fur the count wae the hose hingin oot his helmet. we awe feared the worse because he owes a round.
we turned him over,big horgjunlix took aff his helmet and stood him up..
FFS.... his eyes wer poppin oot his heed.
fortunately the big man hud his ear plugs in so his heed wis o.k.
he's now convalesing at hame wae layers of teabags over his eye to reduce the swelling and will be just fine for the weekend coming. :439:
the stuck guage has now been replaced. :wink: .
Dunno aboot DonZzz but a think big Cha must be intergalactic at the moment, huzznae been seen for light years
Big Cha had a bit of a mishap a while ago...it all happened when we were going intae Michaels' inspection pit on level 9, we needed new spark plugs but level 9 is at 140 bar rather than earth atmospheric pressure. it's because the spark plugs region 2 use are special in that they are manufacutred on gremcenie 4b and so will run better under heavy load and explosivness in the pressure of the cylinders. these special plugs don't come in pairs as each cylinder is different and they have to be matched.
to do this the bike is transported via a gravitational singularity intae level 9 as the fitting hus tae take place under special environmental conditions in the inspection pit thus the 140 bar pressure. but unfortunately as we are organic in origin a gravitational singularity wid throw our cells and dna intae awe sort of the chaotic variations, as has been seen in a few region 2 members, so until we perfect the transportation of organic material we huv tae dae it the human way and use the door. :wink:as we came tae the door Big Cha started to equalise the pressure
eventualy after 43mins the guage drops to 0 bar I turned round and walked up the corridor and went tae download the shelfing code ontae my BFUSB stick, Cha started to unseal the door,when suddenly we heard a shout fae big horgjunlix ...
(Translation)
NNNNaaaaaawwwwww!! don't open the fukin door Big Man the guage is stuck.....NAW Chaaaaaaaaaaa...nnawww!!!!
but it was too late...there wis a catastophic equalisation of the pressure, we awe got thown aboot like bubbles in a newly poured pint of spiced rum an c0ke.
We awe ran back tae the door and big Cha wiz layin face doon on the fler knocked oot fur the count wae the hose hingin oot his helmet. we awe feared the worse because he owes a round.
we turned him over,big horgjunlix took aff his helmet and stood him up..
FFS.... his eyes wer poppin oot his heed.
fortunately the big man hud his ear plugs in so his heed wis o.k.
he's now convalesing at hame wae layers of teabags over his eye to reduce the swelling and will be just fine for the weekend coming. :439:
the stuck guage has now been replaced. :wink: .
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U
Ultima Tony
Guest
Re: Bellshill choppers kf.
Pmsl Kenny :439:
It all makes sense why Michaels plugs packed up in Holland now! :wink:
Pmsl Kenny :439:
It all makes sense why Michaels plugs packed up in Holland now! :wink:
ChaMcg
Club Member
Re: Bellshill choppers kf.
Command, lying bed the day recuperating fae that wee incident and I thought tae maself feck this, am phoning the council aboot them opening up these glesga centrul station tunnels tae fuckin tourists tours. So who did a get when a phoned, wid yi believe it Baltian.
Who in thur right heid wid give this eejit a job. So a thought am going tae dae a wee bit of digging intae why these tunnels are open. Turns oot Baltain in his crew are working ghosters,these tunnels ur no supposed tae be open. A gave horgjunlix the heids up, he says he wull huv these feckers if that's the case.
Any ways Kylothian sent roond these pair tae look efter me during ma recuperating period,
A soon chased this pair, they wur rummaging aboot looking fer ma spark plugs, but it wis ok they wur safe, cause a hid thum in big Tams wallet, nae chance oh any **** finding thum there.
So a goat a Locum sent roon, a think ma recuperation is goonie take longer than a thought.
Command, lying bed the day recuperating fae that wee incident and I thought tae maself feck this, am phoning the council aboot them opening up these glesga centrul station tunnels tae fuckin tourists tours. So who did a get when a phoned, wid yi believe it Baltian.
Who in thur right heid wid give this eejit a job. So a thought am going tae dae a wee bit of digging intae why these tunnels are open. Turns oot Baltain in his crew are working ghosters,these tunnels ur no supposed tae be open. A gave horgjunlix the heids up, he says he wull huv these feckers if that's the case.
Any ways Kylothian sent roond these pair tae look efter me during ma recuperating period,
A soon chased this pair, they wur rummaging aboot looking fer ma spark plugs, but it wis ok they wur safe, cause a hid thum in big Tams wallet, nae chance oh any **** finding thum there.
So a goat a Locum sent roon, a think ma recuperation is goonie take longer than a thought.
hogglide
Club Member
Re: Bellshill choppers kf.
only trouble wi her Chaz is she has a big k**b.when dae ye need them plugs by the way:wink:
Command, lying bed the day recuperating fae that wee incident and I thought tae maself feck this, am phoning the council aboot them opening up these glesga centrul station tunnels tae fuckin tourists tours. So who did a get when a phoned, wid yi believe it Baltian.
Who in thur right heid wid give this eejit a job. So a thought am going tae dae a wee bit of digging intae why these tunnels are open. Turns oot Baltain in his crew are working ghosters,these tunnels ur no supposed tae be open. A gave horgjunlix the heids up, he says he wull huv these feckers if that's the case.
Any ways Kylothian sent roond these pair tae look efter me during ma recuperating period,
A soon chased this pair, they wur rummaging aboot looking fer ma spark plugs, but it wis ok they wur safe, cause a hid thum in big Tams wallet, nae chance oh any **** finding thum there.
So a goat a Locum sent roon, a think ma recuperation is goonie take longer than a thought.
only trouble wi her Chaz is she has a big k**b.when dae ye need them plugs by the way:wink:
Commander Zero
Club Member
Re: Bellshill choppers kf.
Cha...! I've done a bit of investigatin mate, a hate tae tell yi, but that's a bio mass hologram, they are well made and even I wis takin in a number of years ago efter a few rums, :p that's naw how it really looks, see here....the same fekers that operated thon Baltain huv set up a fony outfit tae try get intae the pit by takin yi intae their confidence.. then blag yir entry code...
switch it aff pronto,:wink: yi'll find the switch aboot hawf way doon at the front mate.
I'll update yi on they other two feker efter. :wink:
So a goat a Locum sent roon, a think ma recuperation is goonie take longer than a thought.
Cha...! I've done a bit of investigatin mate, a hate tae tell yi, but that's a bio mass hologram, they are well made and even I wis takin in a number of years ago efter a few rums, :p that's naw how it really looks, see here....the same fekers that operated thon Baltain huv set up a fony outfit tae try get intae the pit by takin yi intae their confidence.. then blag yir entry code...
switch it aff pronto,:wink: yi'll find the switch aboot hawf way doon at the front mate.
I'll update yi on they other two feker efter. :wink:
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Commander Zero
Club Member
Re: Bellshill choppers kf.
At the moment i'm in the inspection pit...o.k. it's a bit late :p but me an the aliens are keepin the noise doon, so we don't waken up Michael.
At 05:53 I'm heading to the constillation of Aquila, We fitted silencers tae the main engines so shoodnae waken up the toon..i've a dynamo to remagnatise along wae a magneto stator, 3 paladium pick ups and 271 inversion pods, there's a magnetar called SGR 1900+14 only 17 light years away so that will dae the buisness efter 1 orbit at 1 light year distant, it's only aboot 12 miles in diameter so shouldnae take long ...aboot 12 min's ...:439:
it's magnetic gravity is fekin awesome at aboot 1,000,000,000,000,000 gauss., oor sun is only 1 gauss and at only 17 light years I can get back by tuesday mornin' tae put the wheely bin oot..think it's the grey wan. :tongue:
but anyway... we were awe getting the gear the gither an we noticed this thing in Donzzz's control room.... the fly bugger has been designing a new sleeping outfit fur the ecky thump doo next year...apparently it's based on an Asda free flow design where by the front 2 wheels rotate together while the back 2 are indipendant of each other, so canny stick when wan wheel starts tae birrle aboot while pushin it. :smile:. there's also an anti-destabillising system fitted based on a class 5 anti gravity emulsifer tae stop him fae fawn aff his bike on wet grass...:wink: big Triblimabininisie or Tam as he's known tae us humans is the gaffer on level 6 and tells me Donzzzz worked oot the design based on his old bike rack he had at the campin' weekend, it's totaly waterproof with a flap on the roof so he can stick his heed oot tae see who's up in the mornin's, but the iceing on the cake is......... yip!....a self induced methain central heatin' system.... apparently he's thinkin' of selling the design blue prints tae a local baked bean manufacturer. happy daze DonZZzzzz :439:.
At the moment i'm in the inspection pit
...o.k. it's a bit late :p but me an the aliens are keepin the noise doon, so we don't waken up Michael.At 05:53 I'm heading to the constillation of Aquila, We fitted silencers tae the main engines so shoodnae waken up the toon..i've a dynamo to remagnatise along wae a magneto stator, 3 paladium pick ups and 271 inversion pods, there's a magnetar called SGR 1900+14 only 17 light years away so that will dae the buisness efter 1 orbit at 1 light year distant, it's only aboot 12 miles in diameter so shouldnae take long ...aboot 12 min's ...:439:
it's magnetic gravity is fekin awesome at aboot 1,000,000,000,000,000 gauss., oor sun is only 1 gauss and at only 17 light years I can get back by tuesday mornin' tae put the wheely bin oot..think it's the grey wan. :tongue:
but anyway... we were awe getting the gear the gither an we noticed this thing in Donzzz's control room.... the fly bugger has been designing a new sleeping outfit fur the ecky thump doo next year...apparently it's based on an Asda free flow design where by the front 2 wheels rotate together while the back 2 are indipendant of each other, so canny stick when wan wheel starts tae birrle aboot while pushin it. :smile:. there's also an anti-destabillising system fitted based on a class 5 anti gravity emulsifer tae stop him fae fawn aff his bike on wet grass...:wink: big Triblimabininisie or Tam as he's known tae us humans is the gaffer on level 6 and tells me Donzzzz worked oot the design based on his old bike rack he had at the campin' weekend, it's totaly waterproof with a flap on the roof so he can stick his heed oot tae see who's up in the mornin's, but the iceing on the cake is......... yip!....a self induced methain central heatin' system.... apparently he's thinkin' of selling the design blue prints tae a local baked bean manufacturer.
happy daze DonZZzzzz :439:. 
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weedavie_j
Club Member
Re: Bellshill choppers kf.
Feckin majic Kenny, had me larfin oot loud in the kitchen at 6.45 jannie time this mornin'
Love that design but I think DonZzzz would be well advised tae think aboot the addition o stabilizers too as it looks a tad top heavy for a wet field. Knobbly tires would also be beneficial tae cope wae the mud at the Ecky :wink:
PS Keep it comin :smile:
PPS keep takin the tablets
Feckin majic Kenny, had me larfin oot loud in the kitchen at 6.45 jannie time this mornin'Love that design but I think DonZzzz would be well advised tae think aboot the addition o stabilizers too as it looks a tad top heavy for a wet field. Knobbly tires would also be beneficial tae cope wae the mud at the Ecky :wink:
PS Keep it comin :smile:
PPS keep takin the tablets
G
ghengis khan
Guest
Re: Bellshill choppers kf.
Kenny what can i say mate lmfao,awaiting the next instalment with antisipation.
Kenny what can i say mate lmfao,awaiting the next instalment with antisipation.
Commander Zero
Club Member
Re: Bellshill choppers kf.
It been a long time folks, My body is just so, so used tae 1/16th earth gravity now, i'm goiny fuckin' struggle big time when I get back...just a quick speech to text to say YES the big fuckin' Space bus (No3) is coming tae town soon it'll be intae earths orbit in aboot a weeks time, it'll be 3 revo's on a high orbit then 2 1/8 revo's on a low earth orbit tae get the new co-ordinates tae land at BHCC...(pause) we're dain aboot 3/4 light speed the noo because we've got 4 stabalizers on the port side that have stuck oot. we've turned aff the nav' lights because we don't want to attact the attention fae the "man" (pause) but yi might see us if yi look south west aboot 5:37 p.m. we'll be just tae the right of Venus on the way hame. giza shout and i'll fire the front gause rifles.... you'll see the blue flashes.....
We've been just so fuckin busy here on Enceladus, we've been mining awe sorts of crazy shit, crazy, crazy stuff you can't even imagine was possible... we managed to rework the atoms of some matter to create a new fuel for the bikes...(pause)
possitives are iiiiincreadable (fukin hooodd oooonnn) sssssspeeeeeeds, neeeeegiviiiiiiiites are it only lasts 7 sssseeeeeconds, but Iiiiii guess if naglimuuuuuufta the new internnnnn scientist we hired is allllowed fffreee free raaaaiiinneee free rain....rane raine... (pause) (deep breathing) (pause).......sorry bout that there....speech tae text doesn't like turbulance at 3/4 light speed....but i'd say that if wee naglimufta is up for it we can.......oh fuck......................watch oot................. bu...kon...le.................
It been a long time folks, My body is just so, so used tae 1/16th earth gravity now, i'm goiny fuckin' struggle big time when I get back...just a quick speech to text to say YES the big fuckin' Space bus (No3) is coming tae town soon it'll be intae earths orbit in aboot a weeks time, it'll be 3 revo's on a high orbit then 2 1/8 revo's on a low earth orbit tae get the new co-ordinates tae land at BHCC...(pause) we're dain aboot 3/4 light speed the noo because we've got 4 stabalizers on the port side that have stuck oot. we've turned aff the nav' lights because we don't want to attact the attention fae the "man" (pause) but yi might see us if yi look south west aboot 5:37 p.m. we'll be just tae the right of Venus on the way hame. giza shout and i'll fire the front gause rifles.... you'll see the blue flashes.....
We've been just so fuckin busy here on Enceladus, we've been mining awe sorts of crazy shit, crazy, crazy stuff you can't even imagine was possible... we managed to rework the atoms of some matter to create a new fuel for the bikes...(pause)
possitives are iiiiincreadable (fukin hooodd oooonnn) sssssspeeeeeeds, neeeeegiviiiiiiiites are it only lasts 7 sssseeeeeconds, but Iiiiii guess if naglimuuuuuufta the new internnnnn scientist we hired is allllowed fffreee free raaaaiiinneee free rain....rane raine... (pause) (deep breathing) (pause).......sorry bout that there....speech tae text doesn't like turbulance at 3/4 light speed....but i'd say that if wee naglimufta is up for it we can.......oh fuck......................watch oot................. bu...kon...le.................